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After The Affair

Author : Janis A. Spring
ISBN : 0060928174
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 87. 76 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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For the 70 percent of couples who have been affected by extramarital affairs, this is the only book to offer proven strategies for surviving the crisis and rebuilding the relationship –– written by a nationally known therapist considered an expert on infidelity. When I was 15, I was raped. That was nothing compared to your affair. The rapist was a stranger; you, I thought, were my best friend. There is nothing quite like the pain and shock caused when a partner has been unfaithful. The hurt partner often experiences a profound loss of self–respect and falls into a depression that can last for years. For the relationship, infidelity is often a death blow. After the Affair is the first book to help readers survive this crisis. Written by a clinical psychologist who has been treating distressed couples for 22 years, it guides both hurt and unfaithful partners through the three stages of healing: Normalizing feelings, deciding whether to recommit and revitalizing the relationship. It provides proven, practical advice to help the couple change their behavior toward each other, cultivate trust and forgiveness and build a healthier, more conscious intimate partnership.

Getting Past The Affair

Author : Douglas K. Snyder
ISBN : 9781572308015
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 68. 73 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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In the aftermath of infidelity, couples often struggle with emotional turmoil and sometimes make decisions they later regret. Based on the combined insight of leading marital therapists and researchers, this book helps them overcome the initial shock, understand what happened and why, and think clearly about their best interests before they act.

Not Just Friends

Author : Shirley Glass
ISBN : 9781416586401
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 48. 2 MB
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One of the world’s leading experts on infidelity provides a step-by-step guide through the process of infidelity—from suspicion and revelation to healing, and provides profound, practical guidance to prevent infidelity and, if it happens, recover and heal from it. You’re right to be cautious when you hear these words: “I’m telling you, we’re just friends.” Good people in good marriages are having affairs. The workplace and the Internet have become fertile breeding grounds for “friendships” that can slowly and insidiously turn into love affairs. Yet you can protect your relationship from emotional or sexual betrayal by recognizing the red flags that mark the stages of slipping into an improper, dangerous intimacy that can threaten your marriage.

The New Monogamy

Author : Tammy Nelson
ISBN : 9781608823178
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 24. 99 MB
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Everyone has their own concept of what “monogamy” means—and most people assume their partners and spouses are on the same page. Couples may assume that they are monogamous, but never discuss exactly what the monogamy agreement means to them. What happens when this implicit agreement is broken? After infidelity, relationships can become strained as both partners lose trust and faith in each other. The New Monogamy offers a way out of these difficulties for couples struggling to stay together after infidelity. Couples make these implicit assumptions and agreements explicit so that each partner knows exactly what is expected of them in the future and what they can expect from their partner. Author Tammy Nelson helps couples regain trust, romance, and intimacy after infidelity by redefining the monogamy contract. The new monogamy contract is an explicit relationship agreement created after the affair that allows each partner to openly, honestly, and safely share their desires, expectations, and limitations. This agreement does not create an open marriage, but rather, an open conversation wherein each partner can have a say in setting the ground rules for their relationship. The book first helps couples rebuild trust after the affair, then engages in a series of Imago dialogues based on questions about what each partner really wants in the relationship, not what you think you should want or what a partner wants you to want. The New Monogamy includes questionnaires, checklists, and candid questions for partners to ask that help welcome complete honesty and trust back into the relationship. Then, the book helps couples make an erotic recovery from infidelity by addressing erotic problems that may surface and offers advice for helping couples return to desiring and trusting one another. After an affair, it’s impossible to go back to the way the relationship was before, but this book offers the chance for a new beginning.

How Can I Forgive You

Author : Janis A. Spring
ISBN : 9780061865299
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 38. 20 MB
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Until now, we have been taught that forgiveness is good for us and that good people forgive. Dr. Spring, a gifted therapist and the award-winning author of After the Affair, proposes a radical, life-affirming alternative that lets us overcome the corrosive effects of hate and get on with our lives—without forgiving. She also offers a powerful and unconventional model for genuine forgiveness—one that asks as much of the offender as it does of us. This bold and healing book offers step-by-step, concrete instructions that help us make peace with others and with ourselves, while answering such crucial questions as these: How do I forgive someone who is unremorseful or dead? When is forgiveness cheap? What is wrong with refusing to forgive? How can the offender earn forgiveness? How do we forgive ourselves for hurting another human being?

Surviving An Affair

Author : Willard F. Jr. Harley
ISBN : 9780800717582
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 51. 60 MB
Format : PDF, Kindle
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A guide to reconciliation outlines steps towards recovering from infidelity and rebuilding a loving trusting marriage

Transcending Post Infidelity Stress Disorder

Author : Dennis C. Ortman
ISBN : 9780307807809
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 63. 71 MB
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Have you been traumatized by infidelity? The phrase "broken heart" belies the real trauma behind the all-too-common occurrence of infidelity. Psychologist Dennis Ortman likens the psychological aftermath of sexual betrayal to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in its origin and symptoms, including anxiety, irritability, rage, emotional numbing, and flashbacks. Using PTSD treatment as a model, Dr. Ortman will show you, step by step, how to: • work through conflicting emotions • Understand yourself and your partner • Make important life decisions Dr. Ortman sees recovery as a spiritual journey and draws on the wisdom of diverse faiths, from Christianity to Buddhism. He also offers exercises to deepen recovery, such as guided meditations and journaling, and explores heart-wrenchingly familiar case studies of couples struggling with monogamy. By the end of this book, you will have completed the six stages of healing and emerged with a whole heart, a full spirit, and the freedom to love again. From the Trade Paperback edition.

Staying Together When An Affair Pulls You Apart

Author : Stephen M. Judah
ISBN : 0830833994
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 26. 66 MB
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Steve Judah explores the phenomenon of infidelity, considering both the push of marital discord and the pull of sexual temptation. With clear and helpful analysis of the relational science behind infidelity, he delivers a tested way back toward a meaningful marriage.

The State Of Affairs

Author : Esther Perel
ISBN : 9780062322609
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 84. 49 MB
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Iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity Esther Perel returns with a provocative look at relationships through the lens of infidelity. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

Surprised By Love

Author : Jay Kent-Ferraro
ISBN : 9781936487035
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 89. 21 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Docs
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In compelling prose, readers are drawn into an intimate encounter with the harsh realities of infidelity, of how and why it occurs and led transparently through a pathway of awakening. Decisions are made to change, and recreate, and ultimately a transformation of a broken marraige ending in divorce becomes a new relationship. Readers are inspired with hope and possibility. Life altering truths about love and modern marraige including the gifts and hidden dangers are explored. This is anchored in the compelling story of two people who choose to triumph over their individual and relationship failures. Plus, a step by step guide to dealing with infidelity and restoring a relationship completes this tale of love lost and love restored.

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