sippy cups are not for chardonnay and other things i had to learn as a new mom

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Sippy Cups Are Not For Chardonnay

Author : Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
ISBN : 1416940839
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 29. 79 MB
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The moment the second line on the pee stick turns pink, women discover they've entered a world of parenting experts. Friends, family, colleagues, the UPS delivery guy -- suddenly everybody is a trove of advice, much of it contradictory and confusing. With dire warnings of what will happen if baby is fed on demand and even direr warnings of what will happen if he isn't, not to mention hordes of militant "lactivists," cosleeping advocates, and books on what to worry about next, modern parenthood can seem like a minefield. In busy Mom-friendly short essays, Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay delivers the empathetic straight dirt on parenting, tackling everything from Mommy & Me classes ("Your baby doesn't need to be making friends at three months old -- you do! But not with people you'll meet at Mommy & Me") to attachment parenting ("If you're holding your baby 24/7, that's not a baby, that's a tumor"). Stefanie Wilder-Taylor combines practical tips with sidesplitting humor and refreshing honesty, assuring women that they can be good mothers and responsibly make their own choices. A witty and welcome antidote to trendy parenting texts and scarifying case studies, Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay provides genuine support, encouragement, and indispensable common-sense advice.

It S Not Me It S You

Author : Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
ISBN : 1439164320
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 75. 63 MB
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Stefanie Wilder-Taylor has never been one to take the easy, conventional route. In her latest work It’s Not Me, It’s You, she unabashedly showcases a life well lived, ignoring all wisdom, but yet somehow, coming out on top. Combining her trademark biting wit and straightforward common sense, the anticipated comedic memoir delivers outrageous tales from all periods of her life and family history. From Taylor’s outlook on working hard (audition for a game show instead) to getting her husband to propose (forget The Rules: try nagging and physical violence) these stories venture beyond daycare, sure to entertain both parents and non-parents alike. Covering a wide range of topics that explore the anxiety, frustration, and exhaustion that accompany the rewarding, comical, awe-inspiring, and life-altering roles of parent, teenager, wife, and daughter, It’s Not Me, It’s You offers readers an escape, empathy, and plenty of laughs.

Ketchup Is A Vegetable

Author : Robin O'Bryant
ISBN : 9781466857193
Genre : Humor
File Size : 32. 10 MB
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If you don't have anything nice to say about motherhood, then... read this book. Robin O'Bryant offers a no holds barred look at the day to day life of being a mother to three, running a household and the everyday monotony of parenting. It's not always pretty but it's real. Whether she's stuffing cabbage in her bra... dealing with defiant yet determined daughters... yelling at the F.B.I... or explaining the birds and the bees to her preschooler... you're sure to find dozens of humorous and relatable situations. From the creator of Robin's Chicks, one of the South's most popular blogs on motherhood, misunderstandings and musings, comes a collection of essays that will not only make you laugh and cry, but realize that you're not alone in your journey. Sit back and relax, pour yourself some "mommy juice," throw a fresh diaper on your baby and deadbolt the bedroom door to keep your kids out... because once you start reading you'll be too busy wiping away tears of laughter to wipe anybody's butt.

Confessions Of A Slacker Mom

Author : Muffy Mead-ferro
ISBN : 9780786722983
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 63. 42 MB
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Parents who are fed up with the pressure to turn their children into star athletes, concert violinists, and merit scholars-all at once!-finally have an alternative: the world of Slacker Moms, where kids learn to do things for themselves and parents can cut themselves some slack; where it's perfectly all right to do less, have less, and spend less. Slacker moms say "No" to parenting philosophies that undermine parents'-and children's-ability to think for themselves. They say "Yes" to saving their money and time by opting out of the parenting competition. And they say "Hell, Yes!" to having a life of their own, knowing it makes them better parents.In this witty and insightful book, author Muffy Mead-Ferro reflects on her experience of growing up on a ranch in Wyoming, where parenting-by necessity-was more hands-off, people "made do" with what they had, and common sense and generational wisdom prevailed. We should all take her sane lead!

Daddy Needs A Drink

Author : Robert Wilder
ISBN : 9780385339254
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 23. 33 MB
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A hilarious compilation of essays takes an irreverent look at the art of parenting from a father's point of view, chronicling the realities of sleep and cocktail deprivation, children's bizarre obsessions, and other unique challenges and joys of parenthood. 30,000 first printing.

Whoa Baby

Author : Kelly Rowland
ISBN : 9780738219431
Genre : Health & Fitness
File Size : 81. 51 MB
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When global pop star Kelly Rowland became a mom for the first time, giving birth to her son Titan, she felt the most incredible love she had ever experienced. But after spending nine months so focused on the baby growing inside her, she was caught completely off guard by how much she had changed. Like many first-time moms, she was not ready for what had happened to her body and for so many overwhelming new thoughts and emotions. She wondered: Will I Ever Walk Again? Will I Ever Sleep Again? Are My Boobs Always Going to Be Like This? Rowland had questions about everything from postpartum bleeding, skin and hair changes, and dealing with aches and pains to getting back in shape and sex after baby. She also weighed the larger notions about what she wanted out of motherhood and the rest of her life. It was a good thing that Rowland's longtime OB/GYN Dr. Tristan Emily Bickman was right there to answer every single crazy question that popped into her head. Nothing fazed Dr. Bickman and she provided Rowland with the answers she so desperately needed, telling her over and over that, in the months after a woman gives birth, nothing is exactly strange, but nothing is necessarily normal either. It's all just part of the "miracle" of birth. In Whoa, Baby! Rowland and Dr. Bickman team up to share this reassuring information with new moms everywhere. Often hilarious and always down-to-earth, Rowland and Dr. Bickman cover every surprising challenge that new moms face.

I M Kind Of A Big Deal

Author : Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
ISBN : 1439176973
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 50. 80 MB
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WARNING TO READERS: The Author of This Book is Kind of Crazy, Kind of Delusional, and All Kinds of Hilarious Whether she’s driving a limo for former Family Ties star Justine Bateman, dancing in the dark for a rarely seen Bob Dylan music video, or stalking a bachelor reject from TV’s Love Connection, Stefanie Wilder-Taylor is kind of a big deal—at least in her own mind. Smart, screwy, and scathingly funny, her tell-all essays capture every cringe-worthy moment of her kind-of famous life. From bombing as a stand-up comic for born-again Christians, to winging it as a singing waitress in an Italian restaurant, to posting open letters to Angelina Jolie and David Hasselhoff, this unstoppable L.A. transplant refuses to give up on her dreams—no matter how ill-advised—and shows us a side of Hollywood better kept hidden. When it comes to funny women—unplugged and unleashed—they don’t get any wilder than Stefanie Wilder-Taylor. . . .

One Hot Mama

Author : Erin Cox
ISBN : 1401939627
Genre : Health & Fitness
File Size : 32. 2 MB
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After giving birth, even the most confident, fit, and spiritually centered women can feel depressed, overwhelmed by the responsibilities of motherhood, and disheartened by their plump postpartum bodies. Erin Cox knows exactly how they feel. She wrote One Hot Mama as a comprehensive guide to support, nurture, and steer women through a fun and completely doable process to lose unwanted pregnancy pounds and create an exceptional life. Erin understands that weight loss is an emotional process, and new mothers need to feel empowered and supported to make healthy lifestyle changes. New moms don't have the time or energy to count calories, but rather need guidelines and easy-to-implement suggestions on how to improve their diet and exercise routines. Using a realistic approach that has proven to be effective, mothers will be encouraged to make positive life changes that will encourage weight loss, positive thinking, and self-love. Women who read this book will not only feel empowered and invigorated to get their bodies back in shape, but the positive changes will impact every single aspect of life—allowing them to live a joyous and fulfilled life as a woman and mother, even emerging happier and healthier than before getting pregnant!

The Chicktionary

Author : Anna Lefler
ISBN : 9781440531224
Genre : Reference
File Size : 20. 21 MB
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You're all over the definitions of "low lights," "ruching," and a "tankini." But can you spot a "Mrs. Potato Head" when you see one? That's where The Chicktionary comes in. With the help of Anna Lefler and her collection of 450+ must-know words and phrases, you'll be in the know when faced with terms like Aberzombie, Bandeau, George Glass, and Puma. So whether you are dealing with a Residual Girlfriend, diagnose yourself with a bad case of Basset Knees, or need to go on a Briet, you'll be prepared for all that comes your way. At the very least, this book will serve as a delightful reminder that everyone has a skeleton in her closet--right next to her fat pants.

Double Time

Author : Jane Roper
ISBN : 9781250014917
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 43. 9 MB
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Becoming a mother is rarely what you expect. Jane Roper never expected she'd have twins—or that they'd be such a spirited twosome. She didn't expect that finding the right balance of work and home would be so tricky. And she certainly didn't expect she'd grapple with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder during her daughters' toddler years. But she also didn't anticipate just how much joy, laughter and self-discovery motherhood would bring. Full of warmth, honesty, occasional advice, and a generous helping of humor, Double Time is a smart and engaging account of the first three years with multiples and a refreshingly candid and vulnerable look at clinical depression. It's a memoir that will resonate countless women—especially those parenting in double time.

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