the present heart a memoir of love loss and discovery

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The Present Heart

Author : Polly Young-Eisendrath
ISBN : 9781609613617
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 20. 88 MB
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After a chance encounter with a handsome, idealistic stranger on a plane in 1969, Polly Young-Eisendrath rediscovered Ed Epstein a decade later when she least expected it. After untangling themselves from their existing relationships, they married in 1985 and spent the next 25 years together. They were soul mates, but in 2001, Ed (at the vital age of 53) began to show signs of Alzheimer's disease. Over the next 10 years, as her husband gradually reversed his mental maturity, Young-Eisendrath was faced with the question, what is love? The Present Heart is an insightful journey of living in the present moment. In a deeply moving yet unsentimental voice, Young-Eisendrath draws on her lifelong practices of Buddhism and psychoanalysis and her own unique view of love, as well as a circle of profound thinkers including author Abigail Thomas, psychoanalyst Nancy McWilliams, and Buddhist teacher Shinzen Young. A thoughtful meditation on the human experience, The Present Heart shows how our most intimate relationships, often the source of our greatest pain, can prove to be our path to spiritual enlightenment. The book offers a new perspective on how to maintain engaged, reciprocal relationships—with a partner, parent, child, or friend—under any and all circumstances.

Women And Desire

Author : Polly Young-Eisendrath
ISBN : 0749922168
Genre : Desire
File Size : 27. 65 MB
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Many years ago the famous French psychoanalyst Jaques Lacan said that women want to be wanted, not to be loved. Now, in her fascinating book about female desire and empowerment, internationally renowned Jungian analyst and author Polly Young-Eisendrath explores this idea further. Women look to others to provide them with confidence, happiness and self-esteem. This reliance produces a need to please others, in order to receive praise. We please others by trying to conform to an image, rather than finding out what our real needs are. If this image conflicts with our inner needs we can become resentful, frustrated and out of control. Often we deal with this unhappiness by trying even harder to make ourselves the kind of spouse, lover, mother or worker who is wanted and desired. We have to abandon these female images and discover our own real needs, without fear or shame. Only by learning to voice these needs clearly, and meet them from within, can we escape the cycle of 'wanting to be wanted'.

You Re Not What I Expected

Author : Polly Young-Eisendrath
ISBN : UCSC:32106013898066
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 54. 68 MB
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A Jungian analyst follows four struggling couples through therapy, locating the psychological predicament at the root of their troubles and pointing the way toward mature dependence

In The Heart Of Life

Author : Kathy Eldon
ISBN : 9780062048646
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 23. 34 MB
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A Mother Loses Almost Everything Before She Discovers True Joy In 1977, Kathy Eldon moved with her husband and two children from England to Kenya, where she found freedom as she had never known it before and was ready to push back from her old, restrictive life. Diving into this tumultuous new world as a journalist and writer, she embraced the energy and creativity of Kenyans, both black and white. But her world collapsed when her twenty-two-year-old son, Dan—an artist and photojournalist on assignment for Reuters—was stoned to death by an angry mob in Somalia, killed by the very people he was trying to help. Kathy's journey through this tragic loss was deeply spiritual as she discovered that, in many ways, Dan was still ever-present in her life. This gripping international saga includes a passionate love, a dangerous coup in Kenya, and a compelling glimpse into a woman on the brink of self-discovery. After her son's murder, Kathy began to publish his art, which gained popularity worldwide and—together with her daughter, Amy—launched a global foundation celebrating Dan's work as a creative activist. Throughout Kathy's exploration of profound tragedy, we find the secrets to not only surviving, but being truly, gloriously alive.

Banged Up Heart

Author : Shirley Melis
ISBN : 9781938288869
Genre : Psychology
File Size : 20. 12 MB
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Banged-Up Heart by Shirley Melis is an intimate and clear-eyed account of finding love late and losing it early--and of the strength it takes to fall madly in love a second time, be forced to relinquish that love too soon, and yet choose to love again. When her husband of thirty years dies suddenly, Shirley Melis is convinced she will never find another man like Joe. Then she meets John, a younger man who tells her during their first conversation that he has lived for many years with a rare but manageable cancer. She is swept off her feet in a whirlwind courtship, and within months, made brave by the early death of a friend's husband, she asks him to marry her! What follows is a year-long odyssey of travel and a growing erotic and creative partnership--until a mysterious bump on John's forehead proves to be one of several tumors in his brain and spine. The nine months that follow are filled with a life-threatening infection, three brain surgeries, radiation, and chemotherapy. Two years and one week after their wedding, John dies at the age of fifty-nine. More than just a love story or a memoir of mourning, Banged-Up Heart comes down solidly on the side of life. It takes you deep inside an ordinary woman, her deeply felt grief butting up against her desire for more than companionship: passion, sexual fulfillment, and self-realization. It bears eloquent witness to the wild trust it takes to fall madly in love and risk profound loss--a second time. Ultimately, it shows that it is possible to dance with a banged-up heart.

Zen Traces

Author : Kenneth Kraft
ISBN : 9781589881280
Genre : Religion
File Size : 31. 80 MB
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As Zen takes root in the West, new forms arise. For centuries Zen masters have tested their students with “koans” and “capping phrases.” A koan is a spiritual paradox that must be solved intuitively. A capping phrase is a trenchant comment. Both are meditative practices that reveal deeper truths about the self and, ideally, lead to enlightenment. In Zen Traces, Buddhist scholar Kenneth Kraft plays off these practices in a new idiom. He selects passages from four sources: traditional Zen, present-day Zen, Henry David Thoreau, and Mark Twain. When a koan-like story about a contemporary Zen teacher is paired with a pithy comment by Mark Twain, something fresh emerges. “In this lovely book, Ken Kraft provides a unique opening for American Buddhism and American wisdom in general. The reader will come to fresh and spacious new insights and enjoyments… Cheers for Zen in America and a deep bow to Ken Kraft!”—POLLY YOUNG-EISENDRATH, Ph.D., author of The Present Heart: A Memoir of Love, Loss and Discovery “I highly recommend this delightful book of East-West wisdom—full of surprise, insight, wit, and piercing beauty.”—KATY BUTLER, author of Knocking on Heaven’s Door: The Path to a Better Way of Death

Suffering Is The Only Honest Work

Author : Casey Gauntt
ISBN : 0692648135
Genre :
File Size : 38. 16 MB
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Jimmy Gauntt--personable, brilliant Jimmy--died at age twenty-four, struck by an automobile. The promising young man's death shattered his father Casey's heart. And yet, in the coming months, Casey and his family would experience something amazing.Through seeming coincidence and moments of magical synchronicity, Jimmy makes himself known to his family, sparking an amazing healing process that leads Casey--a conservative businessman--into the mystical world of mediums, shamans, coffee readers, and spirit guides. Suffering Is the Only Honest Work reveals the strength and love that Jimmy continues to give his family as a force from the other side--one that allows Casey to come to terms with his own father's death thirty-eight years before Jimmy's passing.Join Casey and Jimmy as they discover that even death cannot separate us from our loved ones. Readers will also witness a moving, deeply personal series of letters pass between Casey and the young driver who killed Jimmy--a correspondence of compassion and forgiveness subtly influenced from beyond the grave.

Love Between Equals

Author : Polly Young-Eisendrath
ISBN : 1611804787
Genre : FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS
File Size : 41. 11 MB
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"The modern committed relationship is under stress--we want love and attraction as much as equality and reciprocity. A key figure in mindfulness and psychotherapy shows how to bring mindfulness to the unique kind of relationships we find ourselves pursuing today. A committed relationship, as most people see it today, is a relationship of equals who share values and goals, a kind of team united by love, a common purpose and philosophy, and dedication to each other's growth on many levels, including spiritually. However, we have failed to recognize what a brand-new model this is in the history of the world. The old archetypes and myths and the reductive biological models do not provide adequate guidance for relationships based on "personal love." We need new guidelines that are rooted in sound understanding of our modern psychology and dilemmas. Young-Eisendrath makes the stand that modern relationships, which demand equality and reciprocity, cannot resort to dominance, control, or trust-breaking. Valuing being "true to yourself" in a relationship means we must learn to ongoingly renegotiate conflicts and needs with our partner, rather than necessarily bailing out at the first upset. Utilizing wisdom gleaned from her many years of Buddhist practice and teaching and her work in psychotherapy and couples counseling, Young-Eisendrath shows how mindfulness is the key. Her insights and clinical examples are supported by practical application through the provision of mindfulness-based practices, exercises, and dialogue formats she has effectively used in couples counseling. You may not always like the hard truth in what you read, or you might even disagree at times, but Young-Eisendrath is willing to not only dismantle our idealized projections about love, but also offer a way forward to bring our intimate relationships on the spiritual path"--

Splitting The Difference

Author : Tre Miller Rodriquez
ISBN : 9781938314216
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 33. 10 MB
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At 18, Tré Miller-Rodríguez gave her newborn daughter up for adoption. At 19, her only sibling was killed in a car crash. At 34, she lost her husband to a sudden heart attack. Then, at 36, her now-teenaged daughter found her on Facebook—and began to reshape the course of Tré’s life. With sharp, immediate prose, Tré unpacks the experience of being young and widowed in New York City: the “dumb sh*% people say”; the “brave face” she wears to work and social events; the solace she doesn’t find in one-night stands; and how her perspective only begins to shift when she spontaneously brings Alberto’s ashes on a trip and sets into motion the ritual of spreading him in bodies of water around the world. Once she’s begun, Tré discovers that traveling to her bucket list destinations—places like Savannah, Brazil, and Cuba—is a viable strategy for facing her roughest days, and her loss of her husband becomes a lens through which she begins to view her past and embrace her future. By the end of her journey, Tré has quit her corporate job, explored Alberto’s homeland of Cuba, and joyfully reunited with her biological daughter in North Carolina. Equal parts inspiring, irreverent, and heart-rending, Splitting the Difference is written with the “raw-thenticity” of a woman transformed by heartbreak and inspired by love’s legacy.

Into Great Silence

Author : Eva Saulitis
ISBN : 9780807014363
Genre : Nature
File Size : 84. 56 MB
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Science entwines with matters of the human heart as a whale researcher chronicles the lives of an endangered family of orcas Ever since Eva Saulitis began her whale research in Alaska in the 1980s, she has been drawn deeply into the lives of a single extended family of endangered orcas struggling to survive in Prince William Sound. Over the course of a decades-long career spent observing and studying these whales, and eventually coming to know them as individuals, she has, sadly, witnessed the devastation wrought by the Exxon Valdez oil spill of 1989—after which not a single calf has been born to the group. With the intellectual rigor of a scientist and the heart of a poet, Saulitis gives voice to these vital yet vanishing survivors and the place they are so loyal to. Both an elegy for one orca family and a celebration of the entire species, Into Great Silence is a moving portrait of the interconnectedness of humans with animals and place—and of the responsibility we have to protect them.

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