youre only old once a book for obsolete children

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You Re Only Old Once

Author : Seuss
ISBN : 9780385379502
Genre : Juvenile Fiction
File Size : 88. 93 MB
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With his unmistakable rhymes and signature illustration style, Dr. Seuss creates a classic picture-book ode to aging in You're Only Old Once! On a visit to "the Golden Years Clinic on Century Square for Spleen Readjustment and Muffler Repair," readers will laugh with familiar horror at the poking and prodding and testing and ogling that go hand in hand with the dreaded appellation of "senior citizen." Though Dr. Seuss is known for his peerless work in books for children, this comical look at what it's like to get older is ideal for Seuss fans of advanced years. In his own words, this is "a book for obsolete children." A perfect gift for retirement, birthdays, and holidays!

You Re Only Old Once

Author : Dr. Seuss
ISBN : 0375958908
Genre : Juvenile Fiction
File Size : 49. 70 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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Dr. Seuss's elderly Everyman travels, in rhyme and illustrations, along the Golden Years Clinic's assembly line of medical tests and questions, meeting Miss Becker of Stethescope Row, Dr. Pollen, Dietician Van Eiffel, and others

The Joys Of Getting Older

Author : Thomas Senior
ISBN : 0740708864
Genre : Humor
File Size : 58. 41 MB
Format : PDF, ePub
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See The Lawyers' Book of Ethics

How Not To Become A Crotchety Old Man

Author : Mary McHugh
ISBN : 9780740789472
Genre : Humor
File Size : 42. 8 MB
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A crotchety old man decided to wash his sweatshirt. He threw it in the washing machine and yelled to his wife, "What setting do I use?" His wife asked, "What does it say on the shirt?" He yelled back, "University of Texas." If this man sounds like someone you know, chances are he's a crotchety old man! We all have a crotchety old man in our lives. Maybe he's your father, your grandfather, your brother, your husband-or, though you'd never admit it, even you! From the author of How Not to Become a Little Old Lady here's the companion, How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man, a lighthearted celebration of the grumpy old men in your life. Author Mary McHugh's 250 hilarious truths about cranky, crusty old guys who would rather spend days trying to build something rather than read the instructions are coupled with the charming and humorous art of Adrienne Hartman. If he's ever done one of the following things, it's a sure sign you have a crotchety old man on your hands: * Stood in the middle of the kitchen and said, "Where's the butter?" * Bought cans of broken cashews because they're cheaper. * Yelled at news anchors on television. * Cheated on his diet but yelled at his wife when she ate one MandM. Perfect for Father's Day, How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man is for any man who wants to ensure he doesn't slip into the crotchety zone. It also makes a great gift for that guy in your life who is a crotchety old man but will never believe one line in this book is about him!

You Re Old I M Old Get Used To It

Author : Virginia Ironside
ISBN : 0452297435
Genre : Family & Relationships
File Size : 24. 5 MB
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No matter what they say, sixty will never be the new forty. But sixty-five-year-old author Virginia Ironside is determined to convince people that getting old is really not so bad -- even for a Baby Boomer who interviewed the Rolling Stones and Jimi Hendrix early in her career. Here, Virginia Ironside explores the many unsung benefits of aging. There are ailments, but there are also fabulous meds. There are grandchildren -- your reward for not killing your own children. And then there's "wisdom," that random accumulated knowledge you can label as such just because you're old. You're Old, I'm Old . . . Get Used to It! celebrates scattered memory, frequent naps, and mercifully lowered expectations.

What You Don T Know About Retirement

Author : Bill Dodds
ISBN : 9781451619232
Genre : Humor
File Size : 26. 73 MB
Format : PDF, ePub, Mobi
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What You Don’t Know about Retirement… is an outrageous quiz that helps celebrate the joy of retirement and provides entertainment for any retirement party. This book is sure to be a hit among retirees! What You Don’t Know about Retirement… will have any retiree celebrating this milestone with lots of laughs. This entertaining quiz pokes fun at growing older while celebrating the joy of retirement. What You Don’t Know about Retirement… will provide endless entertainment for any retirement party and is sure to be a HIT! Q: Why do new retirees suddenly look ten years younger? A: They suddenly feel ten years younger. Q: What's the best way for a retiree to make sure his memoirs are read? A: Include lots of clues about hidden money.

I M Too Young To Be Seventy

Author : Judith Viorst
ISBN : 9781416588559
Genre : Humor
File Size : 81. 29 MB
Format : PDF, Mobi
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The beloved author of Forever Fifty and Suddenly Sixty tackles the ins and outs of becoming a septuagenarian with wry good humor. Fans of Viorst’s funny, touching, and wise decades poems will love these verses filled with witty advice and reflections on marriage, milestones, and middle-aged children. The beloved bestselling author of Forever Fifty and Suddenly Sixty now tackles the ins and outs of becoming a septuagenarian with her usual wry good humor. Fans of Judith Viorst's funny, touching, and wise poems about turning thirty, forty, fifty, and sixty will love this new volume for the woman who deeply believes she is too young to be seventy, "too young in my heart and my soul, if not in my thighs." Viorst explores, among the many other issues of this stage of life, the state of our sex lives and teeth, how we can stay married though thermostatically incompatible, and the joys of grandparenthood and shopping. Readers will nod with rueful recognition when she asks, "Am I required to think of myself as a basically shallow woman because I feel better when my hair looks good?," when she presses a few helpful suggestions on her kids because "they may be middle aged, but they're still my children," and when she graciously -- but not too graciously -- selects her husband's next mate in a poem deliciously subtitled "If I Should Die Before I Wake, Here's the Wife You Next Should Take." Though Viorst acknowledges she is definitely not a good sport about the fact that she is mortal, her poems are full of the pleasures of life right now, helping us come to terms with the passage of time, encouraging us to keep trying to fix the world, and inviting us to consider "drinking wine, making love, laughing hard, caring hard, and learning a new trick or two as part of our job description at seventy." I'm Too Young to Be Seventy is a joy to read and makes a heartwarming gift for anyone who has reached or is soon to reach that -- it's not so bad after all -- seventh decade.

Seuss Isms

Author : Dr. Seuss
ISBN : 9780553508413
Genre : Juvenile Nonfiction
File Size : 51. 79 MB
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An inspirational treasury of life advice features memorable quotes by Theodor Seuss Geisel and is complemented by cherished Dr. Seuss artwork from such classics as The Cat in the Hat, Green Eggs and Ham and Oh, the Places You'll Go!

The Dr Seuss Coloring Book

Author : Dr. Seuss
ISBN : 9781524715106
Genre : Games
File Size : 36. 12 MB
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Images from the work of Dr. Seuss for all ages to color! This beautiful book--featuring two colors of foil on the cover--will provide hours of creative fun for Dr. Seuss fans from 7 to 107! With intricate illustrations (some more complex than others), playful patterns, and iconic images based on pages from such titles as The Cat in the Hat, Oh, the Places You'll Go!, The Lorax, and Horton Hears a Who!, now you can color Dr. Seuss's work any way you want! Want to know if your favorite is included? The illustrations to color are derived from the following books: And to Think that I Saw It on Mulberry Street, The Cat in the Hat, The Cat in the Hat's Songbook, Did I Ever Tell You How Lucky You Are?, Dr. Seuss's Sleep Book, The Foot Book, Horton Hears a Who!, How the Grinch Stole Christmas!, I Had Trouble in Getting to Solla Sollew, If I Ran the Circus, If I Ran the Zoo, The Lorax, Oh Say Can You Say?, Oh, the Places You'll Go!, Oh, the Thinks You Can Think!, On Beyond Zebra, One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish, Scrambled Eggs Super, There's a Wocket in My Pocket!, What Pet Should I Get?, Yertle the Turtle and Other Stories, and You're Only Old Once.

How Not To Act Like A Little Old Lady

Author : Mary McHugh
ISBN : 9781882330850
Genre : Biography & Autobiography
File Size : 40. 23 MB
Format : PDF
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In this humorous, advice-filled book, best-selling author Mary McHugh has written down her secrets for living a long and happy life after 50. If you’re looking for ways to enrich your days, to be happier, to find a new approach to life’s problems, you need this book. It’s for everyone who wants to make the years ahead more fulfilling, more fun and more meaningful. Each chapter is a short take on making every day better than the day before. If you want to look better, feel better, have more fun, try the tips in this easy-to-read, lively book, so you never act like a little old lady.

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